Staying on Topic

What's Off Topic? Activity

Consider the following paragraphs. In each, where is the author getting off topic? What should be cut to make these paragraphs stay on topic? For each, please write out the question raised by the topic sentence and the numbers of the three sentences that should be cut so the paragraph stays on topic.


Exercise 1:

(1) My experience going to a haunted house with my friends last week was really scary. (2) The experience started in the fear built up by my anticipation. (3) For days before we went, my friends had told me how scary this place was. (4) My imagination had taken it from there and all I could think of were gory scenes from horror movies. (5) However, the anticipation was nothing compared to the fear inspired by the characters in the house. (6) There was a bloody girl with hair covering her face who was pacing back and forth, but when she turned to look at me, there was no real face under that hair.  (7) Also a man in a black mask with a chainsaw jumped out in front of me and was only two inches away! (8) Probably the scariest characters were the "prisoners" with blood dripping from their lips who screamed at me from cages. (9) This was a lot scarier than the haunted house I went to once as a kid where the scariest thing was a "witch" with a pointy hat and green paint on her face. (10) Probably the most terrifying part of the experience was getting lost. (11) I somehow got separated from my friends and ended up in this mirror maze with flashing lights and more scary monsters. (12) I got badly lost another time when I was trying to find a shortcut to my favorite campground. (13) I just kept taking new turns in that mirror maze thinking I would eventually find my way out, but I was starting to panic and was really grateful when my friends found me. (14) My group of friends has been together since we were in grade school, and I feel lucky to have them. (15) I really didn't enjoy the haunted house and will avoid intentionally scary situations like this in the future.  


  1. What question is raised by the topic sentence?
  2. What three sentences are off topic and need to be cut? (you can just list the numbers of the sentences)

 

Exercise 2:

(1) There were many reasons why I had to repeat my senior year of high school. (2) First of all, I had terrible attendance. (3) Many mornings, I simply could not wake up early enough to get to school on time and instead slept till 9:00 or 10:00am which caused me to miss my morning classes. (4) I also would sometimes skip afternoon classes to hang out with friends. (5) On the weekends we'd often take road trips or go on adventures to places we had never been. (6) In addition to my attendance, when I did actually go to class, I didn't pay attention. (7) I'd sit there reading a magazine or talking to the person next to me. (8) I have a really short attention span and one time even managed to fall asleep when my uncle was telling me a story. (9) The last, and probably most important, reason behind having to repeat my senior year was that I had a terrible attitude and simply didn't care. (10) I didn't see grades or school as important and resented having to go. (11) I was mouthy with my teachers and refused the help that they offered me. (12) I was also mouthy with my parents if they asked me to help around the house. (13) When I got the letter stating I would have to repeat the year, I realized that I would have to change my habits in order graduate.



  1. What question is raised by the topic sentence?
  2. What three sentences are off topic and need to be cut? (you can just list the numbers of the sentences)

 

Exercise 3:

This next paragraph is not a personal essay. Instead it is a paragraph from a multi-paragraph essay about the different kinds of benefits of a vegetarian diet. Don't let that throw you off. The rules are still the same – the paragraph should answer the question raised by the topic sentence.

(1) First of all, a vegetarian diet has many health benefits. (2) According to numerous studies, a meat-free diet will lower the chances of cardiovascular disease and a number of different cancers. (3) This is largely due to the lowered intake of saturated fat and cholesterol coupled with a higher intake of fiber and cancer-protective phytochemicals (the biologically active compounds found in plants) . (4) Also, the way that animals are treated on factory farms is cruel, and a vegetarian diet eliminates contribution toward that abuse. (5) In addition, a vegetarian diet can help in the maintenance of a healthy weight. (6) A vegetarian diet contains considerably less fat and better provides the nutrients the human body needs. (7) The body also needs plenty of exercise and physical activity. (8) Lastly, the combination of lowered disease risk and healthier weight maintenance leads to many other related health benefits ranging from higher levels of energy to overall greater longevity. (9) However, if vegetarians don't eat properly, they will find themselves feeling constantly tired and weak. (10) Statistics show that people with vegetarian diets tend to live between ten and fifteen years longer than their meat-eating counterparts (depending upon region and numerous other factors) . (11) Between disease prevention, weight control, and longevity, a vegetarian diet is a great choice for better health.



  1. What question is raised by the topic sentence?
  2. What three sentences are off topic and need to be cut? (you can just list the numbers of the sentences)