Activity: Subordination and Coordination

Read more about subordination and coordination and how they can not only fix run-ons but also help you show relationships between ideas, write smoother sentences, and vary the lengths and types of sentences you write. Then, practice using these techniques to improve a piece of writing in the activity. Compare your responses to the answer key after you have finished.

Using Subordination and Coordination to Improve Sentence Variety Activity

Rewrite the following paragraph using coordination and subordination to provide connection between ideas and improve the flow of the writing.  Please bear in mind that like the passage about the Corvette, this paragraph is grammatically correct containing no run-ons or fragments.  When doing this assignment, please do not connect more than two sentences together and other than adding dependent words and joining words, do not alter the language or cut any sentences.  Also you might find that there are some sentences you want to leave the way they are; this is perfectly fine because good writing should have a mix of simple and complex sentences.  ("Complex sentence" means a sentence with more than one-word group).

A small North Carolina island holds a secret.  It was the site of an early English colony that mysteriously disappeared. Historians and scientists have conducted research for decades. No satisfactory answer has been found.  In 1585, colonists were sent to America by Sir Walter Raleigh. They built a settlement on Roanoke Island. More settlers arrived in 1587. Virginia Dare was born on the island that August. She was the first English child born in America. She was the granddaughter of John White. John White was the governor of the colony. John White sailed to England for supplies. His return trip was delayed three years. A war interrupted his plans.  He reached the colony. He found it empty. The hundred colonists had disappeared. There was no sign of a battle. There was no sign of violence. The people had just vanished. There was only a single clue. The word "Croatoan" was found carved on a tree. No one could explain what happened to the settlement. It became known as "The Lost Colony". Researchers think they were abducted by Native American tribes or died during a severe drought. No evidence of their fate has been discovered. 


Please keep in mind the following as you rewrite this paragraph:

  1. Do not cut anything and do not change any of the wording.
  2. Do not connect more than two sentences.
  3. Do not open any sentence with a joining word.
  4. Do not use more than one joining word or dependent word in a sentence.
  5. Remember that it is ok to leave some sentences the way that they are (particularly if they have no relationship with the sentence before or after them).