BUS603: Managing People

Numerous authorities have offered suggestions on how to manage conflict once it reaches a level where it should not or cannot be allowed to dissipate on its own. Hartley & Dawson, first of all suggested taking the following steps:

1. Make sure the lines of communication are open. If they aren't, open them.
2. Define the issues. Don't allow a nebulous sense of overpowering disagreement to develop. Be specific about what the conflict pertains to.
3. Focus on the task, rather than on personalities. Discourage or deflect comments that question a group member's motives or personal qualities.
4. Proceed according to your established ground rules, policies, procedures, and norms. After all, you established these components of your group's identity precisely to deal with difficult circumstances.
   

In addition to following rules and procedures peculiar to its own history, a group that's experiencing conflict should strive to maintain civility. As Georges Clemenceau wrote, "Etiquette is nothing but hot air, but that is what our automobiles ride on, and look how it smoothes out the bumps".

Malcolm Gladwell's popular book, The Tipping Point, describes how New York City's subway system was revitalized by David Gunn and William Bratton in the 1980s and 90s. Together, Gunn and Bratton launched a campaign to eliminate vandalism, including graffiti on the sides of train cars, and to prosecute "fare-beaters". At the start of the campaign, doubters complained that more serious crime in the subways and streets needed to be attacked first. Gunn and Bratton insisted, however, that setting a broad example of civility would ultimately create an atmosphere in which potential criminals would be less likely to engage in serious criminal acts. After many years of relentlessly enforcing basic laws mandating public decency, not only did graffiti nearly disappear entirely from the subway system, but overall crime in the New York metropolitan area declined substantially.

Hopefully you will never witness vandalism, much less felonious behavior, in a small group. Malicious verbal interchanges, nevertheless, can poison the atmosphere among people and should be prevented if at all possible. As an old Japanese saying puts it, "The one who raises his voice first loses the argument". It doesn't hurt to calmly and quietly ask that discussion of particularly contentious topics be postponed if comments seem to be in danger of overwhelming the group with negativity.

In addition to reminding people that they should exercise basic politeness, it may be wise at times for someone in the group to ask for a recess in a discussion. Calvin Coolidge said, "I have never been hurt by anything I didn't say," and it may be a good idea in irate moments to silence people briefly to prevent what Adler and Rodman referred to as an "escalatory spiral" of hurtful conversation.

If the tone of a group discussion permits thoughtful reflection, it can be helpful to separate task and relationship goals and deal with conflict over each kind separately. Using indirect communication, rather than confronting another group member head-on, may also defuse extreme emotions and preserve other people's face.

Here are further techniques for managing conflict in group interactions:

1. "Test the waters" for new ideas without making it seem that you're so attached to them that you'll fight to impose them on others.
2. If an ego clash erupts, see if you can identify something that the disagreeing individuals can agree on. Perhaps this will be a superordinate goal. It could also be a common opposing force, since the idea that "my enemy's enemy is my friend" can serve to bind people together.
3. Employ active listening. Strive to fully understand other people's viewpoints before stating your own.
4. If people's comments meander to topics that aren't germane, steer the discussion back to the key issues under discussion.
5. Frame the situation as a problem to be solved, rather than as a struggle which must be won.
6. Treat everyone as partners on a common quest. Invite continued frank interchanges and assure group members that they may speak out without fear of reprisal.
7. Consider carefully how important it is for you to prevail in a particular conflict or even just to express your views. Ask yourself whether the potential negative consequences of your action will be worth it.
8. Unless a disagreement is over an essential point, consider whether it might be best to "agree to disagree" and move on.