Giving and Receiving Criticism

Techniques for Accepting Criticism

When receiving criticism, try to be accepting, open-minded, and willing to seek clarity.

Accepting criticism can be difficult, even when it is effective and potentially helpful. Ideally, effective criticism is positive, specific, objective, and constructive. There is an art to providing effective criticism. Many critics have good intentions but poor delivery. For example, "I do not know why my girlfriend keeps getting mad when I tell her to stop eating so many french fries; I am just concerned about her weight!" For criticism to be effective, it must aim to improve a situation without using hostile language or involving personal attacks.

Receiving criticism is a valuable listening skill throughout life: at school, home, and the workplace.

Here are three things to help receive effective criticism gracefully:

1. Accept you are not perfect. You fool yourself if you think nothing will ever go wrong. You will make mistakes. The important thing is to learn from them.
   
   
2. Be open-minded. Recognize that others often see things you fail to notice. Even if you disagree with the criticism, others may see something you are unaware of. If they say you are negative or overbearing, you may be unable to see it. Allow others to be right, and use it to look within yourself.
   
   
3. Seek clarity about aspects of a critique you are not sure of. You will repeat the same mistakes if you do not understand the criticism. Take notes and ask questions.

Sometimes, it is easier said than done, but receiving effective criticism offers opportunities to see things differently, improve performance, and learn from mistakes.